“It’s one of the most egregious abuse of government power I can think of,” (Former Vice President) Cheney explained. “I remember back in the Watergate days that one of the (impeachment) counts against Richard Nixon was his abuse of power by calling in the IRS to investigate certain individuals that were his adversaries.”

(HT: Fox News)

So I’ll bet you think you’re a real Conservative? Oh yeah? Have you been audited by the IRS lately? I know, I know, personal question. NOYB. But it seems these days like its part of our gang initiation. You’re not a Neo-Patriot yet until the state has given you the tax audit enema seal of approval. I kid, I kid*. However, it’s with a certain mordant sarcasm.

The funny thing is that my participation in Conservative circles has allowed me to know a statistically large number of people who recently have been audited. The ones who haven’t often know someone who has. I mean, unlike the Kenyawn Birf Surtifikate, or Tom Fife’s “business trip” in Moscow, I’m hearing from people who are solid, real-life Conservatives who have actually gotten that metaphorical midnight knock on the door. I’m not a guy who believes the Gubbermint LIHOPed 9/11. Yet, it’s amazing how this one, peculiar segment of the population would have so much time and energy invested in them by the IRS. Maybe we should all feel honored. Not everyone receives so much care and attention from the Post-modern Amerikan State.

You won’t take my word for it. Hell, I’m the crazy, Right-Wing reactionary from Huntsville, AL. You’ll have to hear this from someone all, librawl and edumacayted before you really believe it. Maybe the Washington Post will do. They describe our Glorious NKVD’s latest activities below:

At various points over the past two years, Internal Revenue Service officials singled out for scrutiny not only groups with “tea party” or “patriot” in their names but also nonprofit groups that criticized the government and sought to educate Americans about the U.S. Constitution, according to documents in an audit conducted by the agency’s inspector general. The documents, obtained by The Washington Post from a congressional aide with knowledge of the findings, show that the IRS field office in charge of evaluating applications for tax-exempt status decided to focus on groups making statements that “criticize how the country is being run” and those that were involved in educating Americans “on the Constitution and Bill of Rights.”

What this is, Ladies and Gentlemen, is the first step in how a Democracy dies and tyranny gets established. You see, what the IRS is doing in 2013, is simply an automated, less gory version of what The Praetorian Guard did during the 2nd Century AD to undermine The Roman Empire. We have a group of empowered Civil Servants (this time tax collectors instead of armed soldiers) using the power of the state to coerce and intimidate a specific faction that participates in the American political process.

And believe it or not, I say this about the IRS as a compliment. At least they were good, little, compliant Leftists when they ordered the politically motivated tax-slamming of Conservative donors and Tea Party activists. They could have been like the Praetorian Prefect who auctioned off the Roman Empire to Didius Julianus.

There are two ways this could have gone down. The way I *hope* that this actually went down involves David Axelrod and Barack Obama holding a strategy session. They agreed Election 2010 was a disaster and that the Tea Party threatened to remove them from power. Or maybe they hated the Citizens United Decision with a purple passion and felt that they could use the IRS as a deliberate vehicle to circumnavigate the constraints of that ruling. When Richard Nixon’s White House Plumbers tried the same dishonest garbage against liberal political activists on his enemies list, the proper Constitutional* remedy was applied. So it could easily be applied to Barack Obama.

There is also a much less palatable alternative. Barack Obama and the IRS could be totally telling the truth. The IRS field agencies could be deliberately targeting politicians they disagree with under no compulsion whatsoever and in complete abuse of their authority and power. If this is happening, they have become a modern version of The Praetorian Guard. If the IRS is now a modern version of the Praetorian Guard, you can crank up The Dead Kennedys – It’s Bedtime For Democracy.

*-Please don’t send Darth Auditor after me!