Alaska Man Monday - Peanut Butter, Cheaters, and Bush Rats

It’s another springtime Monday in the Great Land. The snow is melting, the bears are out, the leaf buds on the birches and ash trees are plumping up, and it's time for another weekly installment of Last Frontier shenanigans — along with some heartwarming good news. So fasten your safety belts low and tight across your lap, return your seat backs and tray tables to the upright and locked position, and we’ll get going.

(Peanut butter) Jars of Love!

The Mat-Su Regional Medical Center is the hospital (we only have one until you get to Anchorage) for the Valley. We’ve had to be in the hospital for tests and such, and have always found it well-equipped, well-staffed, with the providers competent, helpful, and friendly. It turns out that they are charitable as well.

In celebration of National Peanut Butter & Jelly Day April 2, Mat-Su Regional Medical Center spread some love in the Mat-Su Community.
The team collected more than 1,300 jars of peanut butter during the second annual Jars of Love Peanut Butter Drive to help stock the shelves at Mat-Su Food Bank and Palmer Food Bank and fight hunger in the community.

My mother was fond of saying “Charity begins at home,” and the Mat-Su community folks are living up to that. That's the great thing about small communities, and even Palmer, where the hospital is located, isn't a very big town — people look out for one another. Kudos to this team of caring folks.

Alaska Man score: 4.75 of 5 moose nuggets. Only one partial demerit for not specifying Jif Extra-Chunky, the One True Peanut Butter.

Next, yes, even here, we have politicians who cheat.

Campaign Shenanigans in Anchorage

Politicians are no strangers to fund-raising and campaign finance oddities, and Alaska is no exception. I’m sure the fact that this particular pol is a Democrat has nothing to do with the story.

Former Rep. Liz Snyder, a Democrat instructor at the University of Alaska Anchorage who represented a portion of East Anchorage (then District 27) for barely one term, was given a $3,673 fine for giving her husband some money left over from her campaign as a “thank you” gift after the campaign was over.

And:

“Ms. Snyder violated campaign laws by (1) giving a prohibited thank you gift of campaign funds to her spouse who volunteered for the campaign, (2) failing to report the work that her spouse did as a debt to the campaign, and (3) not timely disbursing campaign funds after the campaign,” the commission ruled on March 11. “The Commission concludes that Ms. Snyder violated AS 15.13. l l 2(b) by giving her spouse a ‘personal benefit’ in the form of $2,000 thank you gift and AS 15.13.116 by failing to timely disburse or forfeit leftover campaign funds.

Has a familiar ring to it, doesn't it?

Alaska Man score: 0 of 5 moose nuggets. No cheating!

And, finally, a healthcare controversy with a twist.

Viagra for Bush Rats.

Yes, you read that right, but I’m not talking about actual rats. The rare and elusive Alaska Bush Rat is a two-legged critter, almost always bearded, who lives out in the woods and is rarely seen anywhere near anything within shouting distance of civilization. Down in Juneau, a heated exchange over Alaskan healthcare policies dragged the elusive bush rats into the discussion.

Amendment 16 was offered by Rep. Jennie Armstrong, who was, as she is known to do, inserting sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression (LGBTQ) language into the bill, forcing doctors to treat patients even if the doctors don’t feel qualified. The amendment could expose the doctors to legal peril if, for example, they chose not to prescribe hormones to teens for gender transitions.
That gave (Rep. Andrew) Gray another chance to grandstand. He talked about his own experience as a physician’s assistant and told a story about working in a clinic:
“We had older, single men who lived in remote Alaska and out in the middle of nowhere by themselves … She [a doctor] refused to prescribe Viagra to those patients because she believed that they might use it for (self-pleasuring).”

I literally have nothing to add to that, other than it’s good to see a politician standing up for the rights of old bush rats to… stand up. And, if you look through that, you will see once again another squabble over who is paying for someone else's services.

Alaska Man score: 2.5 of 5 moose nuggets. Points for trying to help the bush rats in their hour of… well, need. Demerits for the endless squabbling in Juneau.

Finally, a tale of travels, dangers, alarm, and good humor in China, delivered by a bearded old Alaskan bush rat you may recognize.

Happy Monday!