Throughout the year, we have (dis)honored the press with our regular feature commemorating the efforts of press unprofessionalism, journalistic sloth, and generally deserved media mockery through nominations for The Golden Remington Awards.

Our Trophy is a nod to the olden days when hard-scrabble hacks committed actual journalism and hammered out dispatches on those hefty wordsmith devices. To commemorate that past of muckraking reporting and shoe leather investigation, we acknowledge those journalists or outlets who fall short of that once respectable goal.  

In this third edition we continue with our major categories, which organize the dysfunction and distemper on display throughout 2024, not unlike an award granted to supposed journalism greatness. We’ll give the nominees and announce the winner for each category; here are the distinguished “winners” in 2024.

Distinguished Editorial Writing

• Jeffrey Nussbaum/Politico Magazine - As the annual White House Correspondents Dinner was set to run, Nussbaum saw a need to urinate in the punch bowl by declaring that fun and frivolity in the nation’s capital is no longer a valid reality. No, Jeff does not blame this result on the self-serious scolds in the press, because of course he blames Donald Trump for turning them into humorless, self-serious social scolds.

• Anand Giridharadas/MSNBC - In this insistent display of obliviousness, the guest on the network tried to say that electing Kamala to the White House would show white people how there is joy in having a black person for a boss. Racism aside, making this all the more hilarious is that Giridharadas is talking about the vice president who saw 90 percent of her staff quit because she was impossible to work for as a boss.

• Maureen Dowd/New York Times - In a pre-election column, Mo Dowd bemoaned the polling showing Kamala was lagging severely with male voters. After spending some time mewling over the reality, she then displayed all the reasons the Left has chased off men, with her commentary on Trump and toxic males.

• Padma Lakshmi/New York Times - You already have a tough sell when your entire premise in a piece is to show how glorious it is that Kamala Harris likes cooking. But after giving the hostess of “Top Chef” column inches to get rhapsodic about Kammy’s kitchen prowess, the Times was ridiculed for the headline saying this is something that could make her a great president; they ended up switching that out to something less ridiculous.

WINNER – BELLE BOGGS / NEW YORK TIMES

As a means of showing the benefit of continuing the Biden administration and its support of the general public, Mrs. Boggs detailed a traumatic event in her home, and how general services helped her and her family. She had contacted the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, along with the local authorities--animal control and local health officials--then made a trip to the hospital and endured treatment. Supposedly, Donald Trump poses a threat to all of these services that Belle used – after a bat flew into their home and then flew out again. No one was bitten, no one came in contact with the animal, and no threat to the family took place. But Trump is the real threat, we learn.

Despite everything going on in our country and our state — Mr. Trump and the looming threat of autocracy— I am reminded of how much good we now enjoy, which hangs in the balance of this election.

"A Bat Flew Into My Bedroom and Reminded Me of All We Take for Granted"

This essay is a good example of why we should not listen to bats. https://t.co/HGR1tBq5J6

— Jeryl Bier (@JerylBier) August 5, 2024

Distinguished Feature Writing

• Calder McHugh/Politico Magazine - After eight years of Obama, and three-plus years of Biden (the story is from March), it just then occurred to McHugh that it was curious how late night talk shows are notably light on criticizing the Democrat administration. Stephen Colbert serving as host at a Biden fundraiser finally made the light go on for the writer.

• Richard Fausset/New York Times - The Times writer attended a country music festival, and seemed genuinely surprised and perplexed that the conservative-MAGA crowds were enjoying themselves.

• Paige Cohen/Harvard Business Review - We got served up this deep exploration and explanation of the best manner in which to share your preferred pronouns with others.

• Michael Waters/The Atlantic - The writer nailed down the latest emblem of the elite class in America for the rest of the country to resent them over, when it comes to class warfare. Apparently, it is a signifier of wealth if a residence does not have curtains on their windows. 

WINNER - THE NEW REPUBLIC

Using the tasteful image of Trump-Hitler on the cover, the magazine drew in eight writers to opine on what they imagined a totalitarian America will look like under a Trump term. Their fever-dream analysis was heavy on the dystopian hysterics and light on reflecting that the man has previously served without any of their promised ill-effects.

We chose the cover image, based on a well-known 1932 Hitler campaign poster, for a precise reason: that anyone transported back to 1932 Germany could very, very easily have explained away Herr Hitler’s excesses and been persuaded that his critics were going overboard. After all,… pic.twitter.com/x79Rkh86O1

— The New Republic (@newrepublic) July 7, 2024

DISTINGUISHED SPORTS REPORTING

• During last season’s NFL playoffs, Tampa Bay Buccaneers head coach Todd Bowles fielded a question about how he was preparing his team for the upcoming game in Detroit, considering the frigid conditions that weekend. He managed to be professional as he replied there was no concern, since the Lions have played inside a domed stadium for about half a century.

• Joseph Staszewski/New York Post - During one late-season contest with Syracuse, the Miami Hurricanes mascot, Sebastian The Ibis, was hitting on a sideline reporter covering the game for the Orangemen.

• Ian Kennedy/The Hockey News - The hockey writer actively campaigned for a female collegian to not get drafted by the new female hockey league. The issue was that she supposedly made controversial comments on social media. The primary source that there was a problem with a female having opinions was Ian Kennedy. As a result of his lobbying, the player was selected 10th overall in the draft.

• Amaris Encinas/USA Today - A minor league baseball team has a porcine mascot that retrieves baseballs, and each year they choose a new name for the little bacon-ator. This year’s name, according to Encinas, was “a pretty contentious choice.” They went with Ozem-pig. Apparently, some people regarded this as offensive, though what is specifically offensive about naming a pig this way is not actually explained.

WINNER – MARLENE LENTHANG/NBC NEWS

When Caitlyn Clark was selected with the top pick in the WNBA draft, her initial contract total was compared to NBA rookie contracts. Ms. Lenthang fell on the tired outrage that women should be given a fair wage. What fretters like herself had to ignore is that while the NBA generates massive revenues - such as a new TV contract netting $75 billion - Clark plays in a sports league that has never turned a profit. If she had a genuinely fair wage, she would be paying the league in order to play.

College basketball superstar Caitlin Clark's WNBA contract will see her pocket $338,056 over the course of four years.

In contrast, last year's No. 1 NBA draft secured a $55 million four-year contract. https://t.co/koimAwb3SH

— NBC News (@NBCNews) April 17, 2024

Distinguished Explanatory Reporting

• Les Trent/Inside Edition - When it was learned that to help Joe Biden battle the gravity storms affecting him when he walks, the White House had him outfitted with new stable walking footwear. Trent tracked down the “lifestyle sneakers” at a store to explain all the merits.

• Anahad O’Conner/Washington Post - We  learned of Avocado Hand, an injury so named because there is apparently an outbreak of injuries in the summer from people cutting into avocados.

• Shefali Luthra/Time Magazine - The restrictive abortion laws passed by Governor Ron DeSantis in Florida were laid bare, when Time exposed the tragedy of one man who was challenged with the ability to get an abortion. If Jasper wanted an abortion, he had three weeks to make up his mind, raise the money, and schedule not one but two appointments. He had no idea how long he might have to wait to be seen by a doctor. All he knew was he had to move quickly.

• Eric Deggans/National Public Radio - After Uri Beriliner exposed how NPR operates with a bias in its news delivery, it caused much upheaval at the news outlet. Deggans was among those angered, and lashed out, saying Berliner had been unfair for not speaking to those inside the network. Berliner was himself an insider, having worked as an editor for a quarter-century.

• Jim VandeHei, Mike Allen/Axios - The pair claimed to have cracked the code in figuring out the inner workings of Donald Trump; just by analyzing the musical playlist when he hosts parties at Mar-a-Lago, as he takes control over the music being played.

WINNER – RUTH BEN-GHIAT / MSNBC

The resident historian came on to explain why Pete Hegseth was unacceptable as Trump’s choice to head the Department of Defense. Among the reason she cited was that, at one time, he promoted a product: grenade soap on a rope.

JUST IN: Historian Ruth Ben-Ghiat says Pete Hegseth is a far-right extremist.

"Hegseth has tattoos that are linked to far-right extremism ... It's also interesting that he was making videos selling grenade soap."pic.twitter.com/5mbJwcK3qk

— Resist the Mainstream (@ResisttheMS) November 22, 2024

Distinguished Investigative Reporting 

• Sam Forster/National Post – Like many a journalist, this Canadian was intent to display the problem of racism in America. Unlike most journalists, he resorted to a racist tactic to compile his research. To paraphrase: "Last summer, I disguised myself as a Black man and traveled throughout the United States to document how racism persists in American society." Wearing blackface, in the name of journalism.

• David Emory/Snopes – During a travelling publicity stop, Joe Biden was with some workers and he grabbed a hardhat from one man to pose for a photo while wearing it – backwards. After there was social media ridicule, Snopes snapped into defensive action to debunk the critics, only to later change its measurement, because the people who are the final authority on what the facts are got the fact 100 percent incorrect.

• Julie Brown, Ben Weider/The Miami Herald – The duo came out with an explosive story that Donald Trump was flying on Jeffrey Epstein’s plane during his campaign! Then the details emerged, the first being that Epstein is no longer with us. Trump’s own plane needed repairs, so they chartered a plane from a California company. As it turned out, in the past it had once been owned by Epstein. And no, it was NOT the infamous Lolita Express aircraft.

• Maya Mehrara/Newsweek - In October, Donald Trump attended an NFL game in Pittsburgh, and that night on Truth Social, his account posted an image of Trump decked out in the uniform of the local team. Ms. Mehrara arrived on the scene to inform us that Trump has never played for the Steelers, and the image was likely AI generated.

WINNER – LOUIS KRAUS / MINNESOTA STAR-TRIBUNE

Through intrepid investigation, Kraus was able to track down Bryn Tanner. Following the leads of former staffers or (more likely) just noticing a TikTok video Tanner uploaded, the reporter was able to track down the current owner of a Sega Dreamcast video game system that had previously been owned and played by Tim Walz.

Incredible: the @StarTribune found who owns Tim Walz's old Sega Dreamcast -- a Plymouth, MN man who bought it off Craigslist for $25 from a former Walz internhttps://t.co/NcmKJ06rMx

— Sam Brodey (@sambrodey) August 30, 2024

Distinguished Breaking News

• Patrick Smith/NBC News – When a human leg was discovered on the rails of a New York subway, NBC described the limb as being  “abandoned.”

• Edward-Isaac Dovere/CNN – After it was announced that Kamala Harris would take the lead spot on the Democratic Party ticket, Dovere was on the case describing what she had been wearing, and which toppings were ordered on the pizza, after she learned of the decision.

• James Hohmann/Washington Post – After Kamala made a campaign stop at Penzeys Spices store, Hohmann was thankfully able to give up the itemized cash register receipt from her spice purchases.

• Umberto Gonzales/The Wrap – After a podcast appearance by The Rock to promote his Christmas movie, the staff members at the entertainment outlet were very excited to hear him confirm their report that he had urinated into water bottles while on set.

WINNER – KELLY O’DONNELL / NBC NEWS

At the Democratic National Convention the media-averse Kamala Harris arrived and gave her speech, and then she tried to give the press the slip once more, avoiding any interviews. But Kelly O’Donnell staked out a spot in the steam tunnels and then got the exclusive moment to ask the candidate a question.

 “How do you feel”

That was it. That was the media's probing question, after weeks of the vice president dodging the press.

We happened to chat with ⁦@VP Harris, Mr Emhoff, Gov and Mrs Walz briefly as they left the United Center tonight. pic.twitter.com/5S2nWsHvbE

— Kelly O'Donnell (@KellyO) August 23, 2024

Distinguished International Reporting

• Paul Faulkner/BBC - In this gripping account, authorities in a British town suspected some unlicensed activity might have been taking place in an abandoned store location. They were looking into claims of unregistered activity. That activity might have been the use of the location for a snail farm. Why this story had to be filed before the facts were confirmed is a mystery.

• Associated Press - A comedian on tour had to alter the posters he was using to advertise his appearances. The one-sheet showed him at a table where there was a plate with a hot dog on it. This was said to violate the transit authority ruling of no junk food advertising permitted on its property.

• James Vyver/ABC-Australia – A  health authority in Canberra issued a warning to residents that their office had become aware of a birth control issue. The authority warned not to use the condoms distributed for roughly the past seven months, because they had inadvertently instead issued probe coverings for ultrasound machines.

• Sabrina Penty/Daily Mail - A Chinese aquarium touted a new whale shark exhibit, but upon its opening, there was immediate backlash from customers. Given the trafficking and sale of the fish are banned, the aquarium displayed a robotic whale shark in its tank.

WINNER – DAVID INGRAM / NBC NEWS

Dave was really upset that people on the right were talking about there being cannibalism on the island of Haiti. Conservatives, Elon Musk, and right-wing influencers were all called out for pushing these unverified claims, in racist fashion! Except, the claims were in fact verified…in Ingram’s own article. He mentions videos of gang members on video eating human flesh, with one even being dubbed The Cannibal Army.

NBC NEWS: “Conservatives are OUT OF LINE suggesting there are Haitian cannibals!!”

NBC NEWS (same article:
“There are…um, gangs that are eating people, including The Cannibal Army. But it is unacceptable for those on the right to notice!” https://t.co/bgrBZHitv8 pic.twitter.com/0Sr0eWpqjl

— Brad Slager: CNN+ Lifetime Subscriber (@MartiniShark) March 14, 2024

Distinguished Local Reporting

• Megan Schaltegger/Delish -  A vegan food mart sold gluten-free, organic pastries, which were delivered from a local vegan bakery, when one day something curious appeared in the trays of goods sent over. One item appeared with frosting and garishly colored sprinkles on top, apparently in the shape of the letter “D." It was learned the bakery had been resorting to using Dunkin Donuts as its specialty product.

• Ruth Bushinsky/Daily Mail - Following the arrest of Justin Timberlake for a DUI this summer, the Daily Mail saw fit to do an expose – on the cop who performed the arrest.

• Vonnai Phair/Seattle Times - The knee-jerk desire to accuse Trump of lying about any topic was on display, as the Seattle paper attempted to debunk his comments about protests that took place in the city. Somehow, the paper came out to refute his claims the CHAZ/CHOP groups took over portions of Seattle, something the paper had enthusiastically covered at the time.

• Amy Joi O’Donoghue/KLS Channel 5 - We learned that the Great Salt Lake is drying out, and as a result, there are clouds of salt taken aloft and blown elsewhere. Amy resorted to the tired media trope of adverse conditions affecting minority groups in a worse manner. We were told the sodium clouds are apparently racist, as more affected by the airborne salt are Pacific Islanders and Hispanics, somehow.

WINNER – ESME MURPHY/WCCO TV Minneapolis 

In a supposed fact-check on Trump that was picked up nationally by the CBS network, Murphy tried to claim Trump falsely accused Kamala Harris of helping push the bail fund for those arrested for the riots in the city back in 2020. Beyond Harris STILL having posts on her social media promoting the bail fund, Murphy herself not had only covered the story at the time but interviewed Harris and discussed the topic.

The desperate rewriting of the Kamala Harris history is taking place in the press.
Here is @EsmeMutphy trying to massage the reality of the bail fund Harris promoted, when she was herself covering the story, and even interviewed Harris about this very reality. https://t.co/n7q6mighoc pic.twitter.com/ghYIMkeyFx

— Lie-Able Sources (@LieAbleSources) July 28, 2024

Distinguished National Reporting 

• Michael Rubinkam/Associated Press - This was for a report on a landmark court case in Ohio, where a ruling came down that declared restaurants promoting “boneless” chicken wings can serve a product that does in fact contain bones.

• Maria Louis Paul/Washington Post – At the very time that the press was in full-throated defense of Harvard President Claudine Gay over plagiarism charges and dismissing the claims as insignificant, Ms. Paul had a scathing expose’ on former Representative Mayra Flores allegedly lifting photographs of food from other website and posting them on her private web pages.

• Erin McLaughlin/ NBC News  “The Today Show” - When a pair of shootings took place on the same weekend, McLaughlin noted these occurred “just days” following the SCOTUS removal of the ban on bump stocks. But as people envisioned the cause-and-effect of the killers rushing out to buy bump stocks in order to commit violence, we got the immediate disqualifier from the reporter - The shootings from over the weekend did not involve bump stocks to our knowledge, but experts say if they did, they could have been so much worse.

• Julia Ainsley/NBC News - In a lengthy segment, Ainsey set out to disprove all the claims made of illegals voting in elections. Her main argument was they cannot do so because it is against the law. (This, despite the fact that it was against the law to enter the country and yet, they are here.) Then near the end of her report, Ainsley showed parts of the country where they are permitted to vote in local elections, and that in Texas, they had caught thousands of immigrants who voted illegally.

WINNER – RACHEL MADDOW / MSNBC

In explaining why J.D. Vance is not a valid candidate, MSNBC's resident blue-anon expert showed that the VP candidate is a white supremacist. Surprised? Well, she logically explained that many white supremacists like “The Lord of the Rings,” and Vance named his business Naria, after elements from the books. Further, the word  “Naria” can have the first letter transposed to the end, and then you have (what sounds like) “Aryan.” There you have it - Vance is a white supremacist racist! 

Rachel Maddow claims the "Lord of the Rings is a, sort of, a favorite cosmos for naming things and cultural references for a lot of far-right and alt-right figures" and that JD Vance's company "Narya...which you can remember because it’s 'Aryan,' but you move the N to the front" pic.twitter.com/lfqQ5gXrxu

— Alex Christy (@alexchristy17) July 19, 2024

Distinguished Public Service

• Li Cohen/CBS News - There is still the desire to accuse Ron DeSantis of banning books, and it reached its fevered nadir when CBS News stated that some Florida schools were removing the dictionary for inappropriate content. It required school officials to come out and state this was patently false.

• Chris Hayes/MSNBC - When Congress was looking to avoid a government shutdown over the budget, they tried to push a new omnibus spending bill, but that effort was shut down by Republicans. Hayes decided to take one lament out to demonize the GOP. He claimed the party was denying funding for kids with cancer. He, and the Democrats, were shamed when it was pointed out the bill has floated around since the Obama years; it passed the GOP-led House in March but had been smothered in the Senate by Chuck Schumer. The bill later passed as a standalone bill.

• Bakari Sellers/CNN - What made Kamala Harris a better candidate than Donald Trump? She actually is able to go outside and take a walk.

• David Muir/ABC News - The presidential debate featuring Donald Trump and Kamala Harris was a fiasco of partisanship, as frequently Muir, serving as moderator, was combative with Trump and helped Harris. Following this performance, his nightly network news show took a hit in the ratings.

• Cathering Rampell/ Washington Post - Emotional passion was seen in the press the second half of the year, in the bid to foist Kamala on the American public, but there were precious few more desperately insistent than this effort by Post columnist Rampell to sell potential First Gentleman, the oily and predatory Doug Emhoff, as a “sex symbol.” Yeesh.

• Rachel Maddow/MSNBC  - In her trademark fashion, the pundette tried to show Trump was connected to the killer of the United Healthcare CEO. It worked in her brain this way: Trump nominated Blake Masters to the ATF post. Masters once said something semi-positive about the Unabomber, Ted Kaczynski. Luigi Mangione had been found to have written a review of a Kaczynski book on a website. BOOM - Trump is connected to Mangione via The Unabomber! 

WINNER – NICO GRANT / NEW YORK TIMES

In a blatant example of the press seeking to silence free expression, Grant partnered with Media Matters for America to approach YouTube with “evidence” of accounts that were posting misinformation. Targeting strictly right-of-center accounts, they presented nearly 300 examples of what they declared false information. 

To its credit the video platform declared that none of the items shown violated its terms of service.

YouTube once removed 2020 misinformation, fearing real-world harm. Now it’s amplifying and profiting from 2024 falsehoods. https://t.co/crFhIK9UQR

— Nico Grant (@nicoagrant) October 31, 2024