It is time for a new round of nominations for nefarious news nonsense! In recognizing the efforts of press unprofessionalism, journalistic sloth, and generally deserved media mockery, we have created The Golden Remmington Awards.

This trophy honors the olden days when hard-scrabble hacks committed actual journalism and hammered out dispatches on those hefty wordsmith devices. With an eye to that past of muckraking reporting and shoe leather investigation, we acknowledge those who fail today or misreport in an audacious fashion.

This week, campaign dysfunction and more have been on display. These are the inauspicious nominations, in several categories, to be honored at the end of the year for the 2024 Remmy Awards. 

Distinguished Breaking News

• Kelly O’Donnell - NBC News

With Kamala Harris evading the press at all costs it was newsworthy that a reporter was able to get an opportunity to have a direct word with the current vice president. After her acceptance speech, O’Donnell took up position in the tunnels below the United Center where Kamala and her entourage would be passing through, and this allowed for an exclusive moment to query the Democratic candidate.

O’Donnell managed to make the least of this moment.

We happened to chat with ⁦@VP Harris, Mr Emhoff, Gov and Mrs Walz briefly as they left the United Center tonight. pic.twitter.com/5S2nWsHvbE

— Kelly O'Donnell (@KellyO) August 23, 2024

Seriously. “How do you feel?” That O’Donnell was not embarrassed by this and posted it is a testament to how oblivious they are to their own partisanship.

Distinguished National Reporting

• Christopher Cadelago - Politico

With all of the monumental activities and the decisions made in Chicago during the DNC that will impact and shape our nation for years to come, we can take solace that journalists like Cadelago were there to collect and disseminate the vital information so an informed populace can make proper decisions going forward.

Nancy Pelosi, a hot dog aficionado, gives a somewhat tepid take on the Chicago dog. “I had one last night. It was good. It was … good.”

The speaker emerita says it’s the only thing she’s eaten so far in the Windy City. pic.twitter.com/RxEfaeHeHh

— Christopher Cadelago (@ccadelago) August 19, 2024

Distinguished Editorial Writing

• Catherine Rampell - Washington Post

Like "fetch," the press continually tries to make The Second Gentleman Doug Emhoff happen. We have seen far more of him the past couple of weeks than we have the last three-and-a-half years. And as a sign of just how desperate the press has become to tout/fluff/pimp/promote anything and everything involving Kamala, we get this pathetic and desperate column insisting that the deeply awkward Emhoff is a sex symbol.

We mean, seriously, could you have some measure of pride?

From @CRampell: Doug Emhoff, modern-day sex symbol https://t.co/WXEanw1uyK

— Washington Post Opinions (@PostOpinions) August 23, 2024

Distinguished National Reporting

• Jesse Bunch, Nick Vadala - Philadelphia Enquirer

As JD Vance is on the campaign trail, he made a stop in Philadelphia and went through the required stop at Pat’s for a cheesesteak. At the local paper, they attempted to smear Vance as having misordered the local foodstuff, a supposed career-ending move. Except they lied about what was said.

Vance, while speaking with the staff, asked why it was considered insulting to ask for Swiss cheese on the sandwiches, a clear nod to the time then-candidate John Kerry committed such an offense. The local paper first stated Vance asked why they don’t have Swiss, but the outlet was called out for misrepresenting his words which were heard on the video feed of him ordering. They were compelled to issue a “clarification” on what was actually said.

Clarification: Vance asked why it was insulting to put Swiss cheese on a cheesesteak.

— Philadelphia Inquirer Politics (@PoliticsINQ) August 19, 2024

Distinguished Explanatory Reporting

• Hailey Haymond, Dino Grandoni, Kasha Patel, and Emily Sabens – Washington Post

There are so many questions behind the existence of this lengthy piece about…emojis. The first one being: What editor felt this was worthy of publication? Then, why did it require the efforts of four reporters to carp and complain about the lack of particular images? Specifically, the call here is to expand the already choked animal emoji library with – well, everything.

• In total, there are over 110 distinct plants, animals and other species with official icons to choose from. But some organisms are missing. 

Citing a “Bias against bugs” and “Invertebrate injustice” — as well as a call for single-cell representation and fungus images — we are led to believe that it is somehow exclusionary to not include – every life form? Said one cited ecologist: “For conservation biology to work we need to be able to communicate.” 

A quick suggestion – for full disclosure, I do not have a background in biology, but have you ever tried using words?!

Democracy dies in...invertebrate injustice? WaPo goes #weird here. @Bob_Hoge_CA has the story. If you're not yet a VIP member, you should be. Sign up now - use code SAVEAMERICA for a discount.https://t.co/zAI1zTLDan

— RedState (@RedState) August 13, 2024

Distinguished Investigative Reporting 

• Julie Brown, Ben Wieder - Miami Herald

In a typically explosive Miami Herald exclusive (read: “fizzled”), they delivered this report on how Donald Trump was flying in Jeffrey Epstein’s plane. While that sentence carries some measure of accuracy, there are several qualifiers involved, the first being Epstein is no longer with us and, therefore, no longer in need of this vehicle.

This all stems from the need of Donald’s plane — dubbed “Trump Force-1” — to be grounded for a time for maintenance. As a result, they chartered a smaller plane from a California company to finish one leg of a campaign trip, and the plane sent out, unbeknownst by Trump or the campaign, had once been owned by Epstein. 

And no, it was not the infamous “Lolita Express.” So overall, you end up with a complete non-story.

Anatomy of a Non-Scandal: Miami Herald Breaks Story of Trump Flying on Jeffrey Epstein’s Plane...And?https://t.co/FhR7E8wnl2

— RedState (@RedState) August 13, 2024

Distinguished Local Reporting

• Amy Joi O’Donoghue - KLS Channel-5

The Great Salt Lake in Utah is drying up (if curious, of course, it has to do with climate change). This is leading to salt dust being kicked up into the atmosphere and being carried to other locales. I do not think this will shock too many of us, but yes – this racist sodium cloud is adversely affecting minorities over majorities, as it is said that Pacific Island communities and Hispanics experience the effects more than others. How this sodium cloud avoids white areas is not made clear.

Said one professor behind the research:

• “People here in Utah are concerned about the lake for a variety of reasons — and this study adds environmental justice and the equity implications of the drying lake to the conversation.”

The 800 square miles of exposed bed of the Great Salt Lake is disproportionately affecting Pacific Islanders and Hispanics, according to new research by the University of Utah.https://t.co/QDlCBvisAU

— KSL 5 TV (@KSL5TV) July 7, 2024

Distinguished International Reporting

• James Vyver - ABC Australia

Yet another lesson in not following medical news blindly. A Canberra, Australia, medical authority has issued a recall on condoms it has been distributing to the public. The Sexual Health and Planning health group has announced that what it thought had been condoms were instead lubricated probe covers for ultrasound devices. The outfit that promotes clinical and “educational” services has been distributing these erroneously — since January of this year.

Among the sites where these ultrasound covers had been distributed were many universities, including Dickson College.

Canberra sexual health organisation apologises after distributing ultrasound probe covers instead of condoms - ABC News https://t.co/3Pcqq2hOZT

— rodd (@rodd) August 8, 2024