If you’ve ever had a bathroom emergency, you may just be a white supremacist. That seems to make sense, given an understood KKK-ish cue.

After all, urgency is an Aryan-Nation sort of idea. And that’s why a meeting was recently delayed in the Pacific Northwest.

As noted by Reason.com, “The Oregon Health Authority (OHA) is a government agency that coordinates medical care and social well-being in the Beaver State. During the pandemic, OHA was responsible for coordinating Oregon’s vaccination drive and disseminating information about COVID-19 — both vital tasks.”

OHA hosts a special office for equity and inclusion, the Regional Health Equity Coalition Program (RHEC). The agency is managed by Danielle Droppers, who recently halted a corrosively Caucasian catastrophe.

A meeting was scheduled to take place between RHEC, two partner organizations, and the public; but Danielle swiftly delayed it.

Her reason: “[U]rgency is a white supremacy value.”

Reason obtained the following email about the postponement:

“Thank you for your interest in attending the community conversation between Regional Health Equity Coalitions (RHECs) and Community Advisory Councils (CACs) to discuss the Community Investment Collaboratives (CICs). We recognize that urgency is a white supremacy value that can get in the way of more intentional and thoughtful work, and we want to attend to this dynamic. Therefore, we will reach out at a later date to reschedule.”

But was her need to whack white supremacy with a meeting moratorium urgent? Hopefully not. Either way, select respondents were unenthused.

A couple negative replies:

• “[A]s a person of color, I am calling BS!”
• “Please, educate me on what the state means by ‘[U]rgency is a white supremacy value.'”

One county health official was surprised by Danielle’s denouncement and decided to “investigate it for further comprehension.”

As it turned out, sure enough, urgency is awful. The official found WhiteSupremacyCulture online, which pummels the problematic evil of urgency.

A few of its explained effects:

• sacrifices and erases the potential of other modes of knowing and wisdom that require more time (embodied, intuitive, spiritual);
• encourages shame, guilt, and self-righteousness to manipulate decision-making;
• reproduces either/or thinking because of the stated need to reach decisions quickly;
• involves unrealistic expectations about how much can get done in any period of time; linked to perfectionism in the urgency that perfectionism creates as we try to make sure something is done perfectly according to our standards.

The notion is backed by a recent Washington University Black History Month virtual event, which pegged “a sense of urgency” as a particularly pernicious product of the pale.

The Smithsonian concurs; its National Museum of African American History & Culture has deemed viewing time “as a commodity” a sign of “whiteness.”

To make matters more complicated, the Smithsonian also vilifies as white “delayed gratification.”

So to avoid evil, you can’t do something sinisterly soon, but you also shouldn’t wait too lewdly long.

Back to the bathroom scenario — and going with OHA’s simpler focus on halting any hurry —  postpone your panic or you’re in danger of white supremacy. Of course, if you’re too late procuring pants-free provisions, you’ll be a brown supremacist. You may have avoided the Third Reich, but you’ll have joined the Tu…well, I’ll let you figure that one out.

Speaking of, hopefully Danielle never finds herself in such a digestive moral quandary — if she does, the proudly antiracist Danielle Droppers…could admirably yet tragically live up to her last name.

-ALEX

See more content from me:

University Offers Map Marking Where Gay Students Have Gathered for Sexual Trysts

‘New Scientific Evidence’: World Health Organization Discovers There Are More Than Two Sexes

Man’s Lungs Collapse Due to a Rare Case of ‘Whistling Scrotum’

Find all my RedState work here.

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