And even sometimes when they get to all those things on their to-do list, they find that some tasks seem insurmountable, and they give up out of frustration.

SEE ALSO -->> Caregiver's Diary Part 19: Give Yourself Some Grace

Speaking strictly for myself as a caregiver, that leads to feelings of guilt that I either can't get to everything that needs to get done, or that I don't have what it takes to complete everything (outside of any work which requires a contractor) that needs to be to give mom the ideal home environment that she deserves.

While I've done a lot better at giving myself some grace over the last couple of months, and while I know Mom doesn't expect things to be perfect, me burning the candle at both ends over the last few weeks combined with a series of frustrations and setbacks culminated in me hitting a low point emotionally last week to the point I had to sit down with mom for a frank discussion.

I feel like she knew it was coming, because when I told her we needed to have a heart-to-heart, she didn't seem surprised. Mom has always been perceptive when it comes to my sisters and me. Plus, I don't have the best poker face and frequently wear my emotions on my sleeve.

I first mentioned to her that I knew there were times when she would get upset with herself and emotional because there were things she wanted to do but simply couldn't do them anymore. Some of it is simple things, like taking a full bag of trash out to the container or doing a full round of housework. She doesn't have the stamina she used to, but even if she did, relying on the walker makes certain things she wants to do more difficult.

From there, I segued into some admissions about myself that I needed to make, chiefly that as much as I would like it to still work for me, the pre-caregiver days schedule I used to keep was not something I could ever get back to, because life had changed so much over the last three years or so in a way that forced me to change my priorities.

It's something I've always known, that the family-work-personal life balance had shifted to where day-to-day family matters - even over something as simple as what to do for lunch - had become the first and foremost priority, followed by work, and then personal life.

But it was something else to admit out loud.

I actually cried a little bit as I told her, even though I know it was something that needed to be said. And the more I thought about it and talked about it, the more it became clear to me that this didn't make me a failure at life. 

Everyone's circumstances change from time to time. Sometimes it's a big change. Sometimes it's a small change. In my case and that of many caregivers, it was a series of big changes that gave me no choice but to reshuffle the deck a bit in ways that were most beneficial and which made the most sense in our situation.

Having that talk with mom also reminded me all over again about how incredibly blessed I've been to be able to be her full-time caregiver. If I worked in an office from 8-5, I couldn't do this. I simply couldn't. Schedule flexibility is everything when you're caring for someone else because of the doctor appointments and just in general watching over them to make sure their needs are taken care of.

That talk and then taking a Mental Health Day just to hit the reset/refresh button made a world of difference for me.  The following day, it was like magic - a few things fell into place that I needed to, and someone who has done odd jobs around the house and yard here and there over the years randomly reached out to see if there was anything we needed for him to do - which we did.

It was as if my prayers had been answered.  The old saying "this, too, shall pass" popped up in my mind. And I was immensely grateful that, at least for the time being, the black cloud did indeed pass.

READ MORE: To take a look at my previous Caregiver's Diary entries, please click here.