As an extension of the media-mocking venture at Townhall, Riffed From the Headlines, we once again note the sub-exalted performances from our journalism industry in numerous categories to properly recognize the low water mark in the press.

Distinguished Public Service

• Luke Broadwater – New York Times

It has been a course study in media bias these past few weeks as the evidence of wrongdoing has been building up involving Hunter Biden and his father, the First Mannequin named Joe. In response, the press has been offering up any type of defense, tossing numerous claims to see what will stick. 

At the Times, Mr. Broadwater displays the dysphoria of journalists who strive to ignore the severity of the charges while reflexively defending the Bidens. He offers up a brand new explanation of President Jose Biden being involved with Hunter’s foreign entanglements: Meh, this is all old news.

• It has long been known that the elder Mr. Biden at times interacted with his son’s business partners.

Of course, this has to ignore that the president has been denying this type of involvement for years now. Not sure how Luke pretends to ignore that component – since he mentions Biden’s years of denials in the very same article.

President Biden met with and spoke to his son Hunter's business associates on a number of occasions but was not party to any of his deals, Hunter Biden's former business partner told Congress on Monday. https://t.co/WyBg9DBpJR

— The New York Times (@nytimes) August 1, 2023

Distinguished National Reporting

• Michael Collins – USA Today

The Hunter Biden defense in the press has been so pervasive that we could have dedicated an entire Pulitzer dis-honors column just to these attempts. Among the weakest, however, is this consummate defense of Hunter & Joe from Michael Collins.

Collins looks over the rap sheet of the President’s lad and comes to a conclusion – these crimes are just “foibles.” The international graft, hookers, recidivist drug use, gun crimes, millions of dollars in tax evasion, ignoring his bastard daughter – these are mere “foibles.”

Hunter Biden's foibles provide ammunition for Republicans who want to inflict harm on Joe Biden ahead of 2024 presidential campaign. https://t.co/5eQkuBpIJJ

— USA TODAY (@USATODAY) July 29, 2023

Distinguished Cultural Criticism

• Rolling Stone Magazine

The uproar over Jason Aldean’s hit song “Try That In A Small Town” has been a media sensation, and there may not be an outlet that has taken this harder than Rolling Stone. After leading the charge in reporting on the song’s “controversial” aspects, the magazine went into full cancellation mode, even attempting to fight back efforts at defending Aldean. Last week RS tried to save face by suggesting that it was supposedly a failure when the song “only” debuted at #2 on the national chart. The tone of a resounding defeat is palpable now, as the outlet ruefully had to report that Aldean ultimately made it to the #1 position on the Hot 100 chart, despite more than a dozen articles written about the song in the span of a week.

This outlet is all kinds of livid that the attempt to cancel Aldean failed spectacularly.

Congratulations @RollingStone!
You have earned the BUTTHURT achievement badge!#MartiniSharkDemeritBadges https://t.co/KrRhPw0OTQ pic.twitter.com/DzLr6GdAdh

— Brad Slager: CNN+ Lifetime Subscriber (@MartiniShark) August 2, 2023

Distinguished Explanatory Reporting

• Li Cohen – CBS News

The smash hit film “Barbie,” of course, has electrified the press into generating as many clickbait traffic-driving pieces connected to the hype as possible. One of the most desperate lurches was this insipid attempt, in which we have to endure a climate lecture, with the iconic doll used as the prop to justify the lecture.

If you want me to take your global warming warning seriously, telling me how the global calamity could transform Barbie’s dream home into a “nightmare house” is not the way to do so.

CBS News: You Better Get out and See the ‘Barbie’ Movie Before She Dies Due to Global Warming! https://t.co/rF7EjATY6C

— RedState (@RedState) July 25, 2023

Distinguished Investigative Reporting

• Sofia Bliss-Carrascosa, Louis Jacobson, Amy Sherman – Politifact

As the press roiled over the Florida education system supposedly teaching that slavery was a net benefit for blacks, Kamala Harris, of course, jumped into the fray to make more political hits, and Politifact was there to dutifully defend the Vice President. In its piece declaring that Harris was Mostly True when she hurled this accusation, the true detectors exposed the sham in the process.

The cited curriculum guide is over 200 pages, containing hundreds of teaching modules with extensive lessons on the horrors of slavery, yet Politifact finds this to be a sufficient explanation of the entire guidebook:

Although the new standards include many conventional lesson points about the history of slavery, they also include a sentence that enslaved people developed skills that “could be applied for their personal benefit. 

Kamala Harris – Do Florida school standards say ‘enslaved people benefited from slavery,’ as Kamala Harris said? https://t.co/j2kkEzB3Da

— NFN – News Facts Network (@FactsNfn) July 24, 2023

Distinguished Photojournalism

• CNN

Recently the press complex was all excited because the United Nations issued a report that stated this summer, the planet was hotter than it has been in 120,000 years. That no one in the media was even the least bit curious about the details – especially since this derived from the U.N. – speaks to everything.

At CNN, they were eager to join in on the hype, and it is clear just how eager they were. In the rush to repeat this spurious claim – for reasons that make no sense whatsoever – the site provided a photo of three women bundled in a jacket, sweater, and hoodie.

Heat waves in three continents have driven the planet's average temperature in July to levels not seen in 120,000 years, scientists say https://t.co/IMX5qsZPig pic.twitter.com/GMr1XYrSDy

— CNN (@CNN) July 27, 2023

Distinguished Feature Writing

• Char Adams – NBC News

We all know the desire in the press to find any and all things which are racially intolerant and exclusionary is expansive. But we have approached the point where we have even passed the adage, “If everything is racist, then nothing is racist.” Ms. Adams, writing at the black portal of NBC News, has a lengthy report about how people of color are reclaiming…nature?

The old axiom was true to an extent. Was communing deeply with nature truly a ‘white thing?’ A few of the many organizations are working to provide safe spaces for Black people to enjoy outdoor activities and dispel myths that the outdoors doesn’t belong to us. 

Allow me to provide a new axiom: “If the outdoors is racist, then nobody cares about racism.”

“There is trauma related to being outdoors,” the founder of an organization working to provide safe spaces for Black people to enjoy outdoor activities says.

“There's a lot of healing that we as a Black community must do.” https://t.co/pGFNa6gJQO

— NBC News (@NBCNews) July 26, 2023

Distinguished International Reporting

• Sarah Elmes – Plymouth Herald

In the southwest region of England, there is an announcement of a “fun-filled family event” staged at a local facility. On August 3, there will be “a range of engaging games and activities for children, plus a range of food stalls and tours of the facility.”

Sounds like a fantastic time for all of the family to head out for a glorious day spent at – the local waste incinerator!

You can still find affordable airfare to jet on over to Plymouth, England for this once-a-year event!https://t.co/TkFepa0x6j

— Lie-Able Sources (@LieAbleSources) August 2, 2023